Finally, this past summer, I discovered that I could not run anymore. It is a waste of time and energy! What I had known in my head finally became real in my heart. I decided that I would do those things that I knew I was supposed to do and had been running from for years. I chose to let go of my fears and get to know people, get to know them and actually let them get to know me as well (a little bit). I still run from creeps and cows who give me the evil eye, but other things like getting to know my Grandma better and getting closer to my family doesn't seem quite so freaky anymore. Anyways, I am beginning to find out that standing still and getting to know other people is actually a good thing... isn't it? Maybe. There is always the possibility of getting hurt, but perhaps it is worth the risk. We'll see. Now lets just hope that I don't suddenly go from running away from life to chasing it down till it turns and runs from me. Sigh* There is always something new to learn. :)
2 comments:
you know it is intresting to me. This whole running thing. I hadn't read this before I saw you this last time. That you decided to quit running nor that you were a runner in gerneral. But I can totaly see it. now that I read this I understand you a bit better. And you know what? I noticed a difference this last time I saw you. You were more relaxed. I could feel an openness from you that I had not felt before. It was really nice. I felt free to know you. that you were willing to open your heart up.
Just so you know. It looks really good on you.
And if there is anything I understand it is the desire to run from scary situations. But one thing I have been learning over the years. It is those times of discomfort that can bring the most joy in the end. When I allow myself to be in places that I would normaly have run from I find that there are opertunities there that I would not have dreamed of. For instance if I had run like normal I would not be engaged to be married this winter.
I tell you that just to try to encourage you. It is good the choice you have made and it will be worth it in the end. Even if it is hard at times.
Love you and look forward to getting to know you better.
Aww, thanks Ange! You are so sweet! :)
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